Retailer jokesters showed off the food industry's sense of humor on April Fools' Day with video spoofs, fake press releases and other silly promotions.
St. Louis-based Schnuck Markets announced that it would be opening a new location on top of the Gateway Arch, complete with an elevator to bring down groceries.
“It’s an intimate, but lovely setting and it times, it could be a bit wobbly. Our architectural design team has accounted for that sway," deadpanned Anthony Hucker, president and chief operating officer at Schnucks, in a video posted on Facebook.
"But now you can enjoy the best views in the city of St. Louis — the gateway to the west — while eating fresh donuts and shopping for the whole family.”
E-commerce retailer FreshDirect sent a trend alert to customers to promote a new “5-day cheese cleanse” paired with wine and beer that was “scientifically proven to sharpen” customers’ minds and bodies.
On the linked cheese product page, Fresh Direct announced the cleanse was a joke, but noted "we still fully support your cheese addiction."
In the UK, Tesco announced that it would be introducing "bouncy aisles" so that customers could jump to hard-to-reach upper shelves and have fun while grocery shopping.
April Fools' Day veterans PCC Natural Markets and Whole Foods Markets again proved the natural and organic sect knows how to laugh at itself. Both retailers devoted their homepages to spoof news.
Seattle-based PCC Natural Markets included faux advice like "Ask the Nutritionist: brain alternatives for vegan zombies" and promotions for "Fresh squeezed water" at the juice bar.
Whole Foods Market went as far to write fake press releases for new items like an in-store tattoo parlors complete with squid and vegetable inks.
A "facial hair stylist" Hopper Salinger was quoted as saying "Amped to get my new tat from Whole Foods Market. When they announced Whole Ink, I was like, whoa. I think I'll get the kale and beet ink because I actually know the farmer who makes it.
Other Whole Foods April Fools' promotions include 13 egg carton for the retailer's private label "366" Every Day Value brand, flavored oxygen and grass-fed wheatgrass.
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